1 00:00:02,688 --> 00:00:05,519 How. 2 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:07,919 White man come with iron buffalo. 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:10,799 I know what a bulldozer is. You can't build here. 4 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:14,079 This land is on top of an ancient indian burial ground. 5 00:00:14,103 --> 00:00:15,759 Well, that's why we're gonna dig this up, 6 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:18,527 build condos, then put the ancient indian burial ground 7 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:21,507 back on the roof. And to make it up to you, here's 8 00:00:21,531 --> 00:00:23,297 two tickets to a baseball game, okay? 9 00:00:23,321 --> 00:00:26,189 - But there are four of us. - Well, I guess you'll have to scalp some. 10 00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:30,031 Let's see... put the jacuzzis right here and... 11 00:00:32,352 --> 00:00:34,813 Mr. Pickles! 12 00:00:52,897 --> 00:00:54,527 Good boy! 13 00:00:56,058 --> 00:01:00,159 Oh, boy! My first baseball game! Maybe I can catch a ball. 14 00:01:00,192 --> 00:01:02,239 Honey, let me drop you off and take the truck. 15 00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:04,159 But whenever you borrow my truck, it comes 16 00:01:04,191 --> 00:01:05,590 back with a new dent. 17 00:01:05,614 --> 00:01:07,471 You won't have to pay for parking. 18 00:01:07,552 --> 00:01:10,150 Aren't you excited, Mr. Pickles? 19 00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:12,319 Oh, Mr. Pickles! 20 00:01:12,352 --> 00:01:14,319 You can't bring that dog to the game. 21 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,031 He's been cutting people's heads off. 22 00:01:16,112 --> 00:01:18,591 - I've seen him do it. - Mr. Pickles! 23 00:01:18,672 --> 00:01:21,071 You're having a hard time with this water. 24 00:01:25,311 --> 00:01:27,582 - Morning, Goodmans! - Morning! 25 00:01:27,648 --> 00:01:29,823 Mr. Bojenkins is teaching me 26 00:01:29,888 --> 00:01:31,775 how to crip-walk. 27 00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:33,727 - Sweet! - Remember, now... heel, toe, 28 00:01:33,792 --> 00:01:35,039 - heel, toe. - Like this? 29 00:01:35,104 --> 00:01:37,279 - Nope. - Sheriff, Mr. Pickles 30 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:39,519 is cutting people's heads off. 31 00:01:39,584 --> 00:01:43,039 Remember the time he told us Mr. Pickles forced him to wear 32 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,871 that dead possum like a diaper? 33 00:01:48,432 --> 00:01:50,831 Whoa! Look at all the indians! 34 00:01:50,912 --> 00:01:52,511 Bye, mom! 35 00:01:52,592 --> 00:01:54,431 - Bye, dear. - Have fun at the game. 36 00:01:54,512 --> 00:01:56,669 Remember, no new dents on my truck! 37 00:01:56,693 --> 00:02:01,471 Today, the old town featherheads take on the southville worms! 38 00:02:01,552 --> 00:02:04,159 'Course, some folks want the featherheads name to change, 39 00:02:04,192 --> 00:02:07,119 calling it racist. But they've been unsuccessful, 40 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:10,751 just like my son, who dropped out of college to become a mime. 41 00:02:10,832 --> 00:02:13,711 Anyhoo, today, we've got a special guest in the crowd... 42 00:02:13,792 --> 00:02:15,951 Miss Fulton, the oldest person in old town. 43 00:02:16,032 --> 00:02:19,711 She's 119 years young, and we are honored to have her here. 44 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:21,919 - You can eat my ass! - Well, it looks like 45 00:02:21,951 --> 00:02:24,399 these are our seats... foul-ball territory. 46 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:26,111 Maybe I can catch a foul ball! 47 00:02:26,192 --> 00:02:27,713 I'll show you how to catch some balls! 48 00:02:27,759 --> 00:02:29,443 Hey! Ho! 49 00:02:31,072 --> 00:02:33,151 Oh. Excuse me. 50 00:02:33,232 --> 00:02:35,231 Traffic. Well, here we go. 51 00:02:35,312 --> 00:02:37,358 Oh, my goodness! 52 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:42,058 - I cut your legs off! - Well, don't give yourself so much credit. 53 00:02:42,912 --> 00:02:47,471 I had my legs cut off so I could sneak booze into places. 54 00:02:47,552 --> 00:02:52,031 O-one for whiskey, one for soda. Drink? 55 00:02:52,096 --> 00:02:56,031 - Um, no, thanks. - I'm having a tailgate party. 56 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:59,164 - Wanna come? - I'm not really a baseball fan. 57 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,751 Well, I guess I could go for a little while. 58 00:03:02,832 --> 00:03:04,223 Come on! 59 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:09,064 - Kiss cam! - You're on the kiss cam, buddy! 60 00:03:09,088 --> 00:03:09,839 The what? 61 00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:10,920 - The kiss cam. - Kiss me! 62 00:03:11,040 --> 00:03:12,831 Sorry, everybody. We're not together. 63 00:03:12,879 --> 00:03:14,399 Screw you, jerk! 64 00:03:14,432 --> 00:03:16,239 What, do you hate America? 65 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:18,239 Boo! This is fun! 66 00:03:18,272 --> 00:03:19,631 Yeah, uh, you know what? 67 00:03:19,712 --> 00:03:21,199 Maybe I'll go grab us some snacks. 68 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:23,279 And I'll stay here and catch a foul ball. 69 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:25,791 Okay, son. Hot dogs! 70 00:03:29,312 --> 00:03:33,439 - No! I won't let you do it! - Why? Because we're gay? 71 00:03:33,472 --> 00:03:35,679 What?! That dog was gonna cut your head off. 72 00:03:35,712 --> 00:03:37,151 Oh, it's fake. 73 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:39,391 - What are you, crazy?! - Boo! 74 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:42,031 Peanuts! Get your peanuts! And cocaine. 75 00:03:42,112 --> 00:03:44,871 - Peanuts! - It's Jim "Fouler" Johnson at the plate. 76 00:03:44,895 --> 00:03:46,559 He's never hit a fair ball in 77 00:03:46,624 --> 00:03:49,407 his 22-year career. Fouler, of course, the all-time 78 00:03:49,504 --> 00:03:53,055 foul-ball leader, closing in on 30,000 foul balls, giving new 79 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:56,511 meaning to the word "failure." And another failure, my son, who 80 00:03:56,592 --> 00:03:58,479 turned to selling his body for alcohol. 81 00:03:58,592 --> 00:04:00,719 - And here's the pitch! - I hope I catch one soon. 82 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,239 My arm sure is tired. 83 00:04:02,272 --> 00:04:03,711 You can do it, Tommy. 84 00:04:03,759 --> 00:04:06,111 Just a little bump. 85 00:04:06,192 --> 00:04:08,031 Curving foul! 86 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,351 - Aw, darn it! - Hey! What are you, blind? 87 00:04:12,432 --> 00:04:14,302 - I'm blind! - Maybe I'll catch the next one. 88 00:04:14,326 --> 00:04:18,158 That was foul ball 29,999 for Fouler. 89 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:20,799 The next one could fetch a hefty 90 00:04:20,864 --> 00:04:24,799 sum with collectors. 91 00:04:28,053 --> 00:04:30,031 - High fly ball! - It's coming this way! 92 00:04:30,112 --> 00:04:31,656 - Out of my way! - Where's the ball, boy? 93 00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:34,689 Where's the ball, boy? 94 00:04:36,103 --> 00:04:37,415 - Foul! - I did it. 95 00:04:37,439 --> 00:04:40,503 That ball could be worth a lot of money. 96 00:04:40,527 --> 00:04:42,142 That ugly kid has the ball. 97 00:04:42,166 --> 00:04:43,363 - Cool, huh? - Get him! 98 00:04:44,809 --> 00:04:46,569 You want him?! You go through me! 99 00:04:46,666 --> 00:04:48,697 Kid, come with me! 100 00:04:48,778 --> 00:04:50,457 - You'll be safe! - Where did he go?! 101 00:04:50,538 --> 00:04:53,289 - Tommy? Tommy?! - Has anybody seen my dog? 102 00:04:58,170 --> 00:05:02,217 And that's how I ended up sleeping with a mime. 103 00:05:02,249 --> 00:05:04,008 Just kidding... maybe. Drink? 104 00:05:04,058 --> 00:05:06,777 Uh, no, thanks. It is quiet over here. 105 00:05:06,858 --> 00:05:10,457 Well, nobody wants to tailgate with a guy who's been 106 00:05:10,537 --> 00:05:14,589 - drinking all by himself. - Well... Maybe just a sip. 107 00:05:16,137 --> 00:05:18,089 - Hey! Y'all partying? - Can we use your grill? 108 00:05:18,138 --> 00:05:20,409 - Well, sure you can use grill. - Bottoms up. 109 00:05:20,489 --> 00:05:21,489 Hi! 110 00:05:23,930 --> 00:05:25,769 Kiss cam! 111 00:05:25,850 --> 00:05:27,817 Oh, my God. Kiss my wife! Kiss my wife! 112 00:05:27,898 --> 00:05:29,641 - Sorry... no. - What? 113 00:05:29,706 --> 00:05:32,329 - She not good enough for you? - No, I just... 114 00:05:32,378 --> 00:05:34,888 Tommy?! Tommy?! 115 00:05:34,970 --> 00:05:36,856 That's his glove! 116 00:05:36,938 --> 00:05:39,497 Show me where he is. I can't believe I'm following you. 117 00:05:39,529 --> 00:05:41,808 But for once, maybe you are being a good boy. 118 00:05:42,650 --> 00:05:44,553 He's in here? Tommy's not in... 119 00:05:44,618 --> 00:05:47,816 Hey! Mr. Pickles! 120 00:05:47,850 --> 00:05:51,017 Oh, no! 121 00:05:56,876 --> 00:06:00,329 - That's a very special ball you have. - I'm gonna get it autographed. 122 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:02,216 As you can see, I collect 123 00:06:02,250 --> 00:06:05,656 very valuable collectibles. Perhaps I could take care of 124 00:06:05,738 --> 00:06:08,297 - that ball for you. - I got some collextibles, too, baby. 125 00:06:08,329 --> 00:06:09,329 Wanna trade? 126 00:06:09,370 --> 00:06:11,406 How 'bout this antique baseball hat? 127 00:06:11,430 --> 00:06:12,503 That's a jockstrap! 128 00:06:12,527 --> 00:06:13,906 - Ooh! What's this one do? - Put that back! 129 00:06:13,930 --> 00:06:15,291 Oh! What's that? Don't touch that! 130 00:06:15,370 --> 00:06:17,928 - Ooh! What's that? - Hey! Where'd that boy go?! 131 00:06:17,978 --> 00:06:19,817 Nice doing business with ya! 132 00:06:20,542 --> 00:06:22,857 Cocaine! Get your cocaine! 133 00:06:26,194 --> 00:06:28,169 Hello? Anyone here? 134 00:06:28,218 --> 00:06:31,395 You're Jim "Fouler" Johnson! 135 00:06:31,419 --> 00:06:36,809 Yup... biggest failure in baseball history. But I'm moving on. 136 00:06:36,858 --> 00:06:39,769 But before you go, I wanted to get you to sign... 137 00:06:39,850 --> 00:06:41,449 - Whatever! - But I... 138 00:06:41,529 --> 00:06:43,609 - I said, "shut up!" - No, you didn't! 139 00:06:43,690 --> 00:06:47,369 So you shut up! Anyway, you hit this ball right 140 00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,666 to me, and it's the best thing that's ever happened to me. 141 00:06:49,690 --> 00:06:53,369 And I know it's a special ball, so I thought you should have it. 142 00:06:53,449 --> 00:06:56,009 That's the best thing anybody has ever... 143 00:06:56,090 --> 00:06:57,288 Catch! Oww! 144 00:06:57,338 --> 00:06:58,808 Hey! 145 00:06:58,890 --> 00:07:01,017 - Where are you going? - Help! Tommy! 146 00:07:01,098 --> 00:07:05,449 - Ohhh. I'm so hot in here. - Take it off! 147 00:07:05,529 --> 00:07:07,177 Take it off! Take it off! 148 00:07:07,210 --> 00:07:11,848 Okay! 149 00:07:11,930 --> 00:07:15,049 - There you are! - It's a great party. 150 00:07:15,129 --> 00:07:17,369 - But nobody likes me. - Hey! 151 00:07:17,449 --> 00:07:19,049 Meet Hank. 152 00:07:19,130 --> 00:07:22,089 He cut off his legs so he can sneak booze wherever he wants. 153 00:07:22,138 --> 00:07:24,873 Cool! I use my bra to smuggle food. 154 00:07:24,937 --> 00:07:27,177 Drink? Sandwich? Quesadilia? 155 00:07:27,242 --> 00:07:29,576 Oh, wow, you got a lot of stuff in there. 156 00:07:29,610 --> 00:07:31,529 - Clam chowder? - Uh-huh! 157 00:07:31,657 --> 00:07:35,209 Tommy, all I've ever hit was foul balls, 158 00:07:35,258 --> 00:07:37,608 and I thought of myself as a failure. 159 00:07:37,690 --> 00:07:42,384 But you made me realize these foul balls mean something to somebody. 160 00:07:42,408 --> 00:07:43,408 Wow! Thanks! 161 00:07:43,450 --> 00:07:47,897 So I'm gonna hit the best foul ball anybody's ever seen! 162 00:07:47,977 --> 00:07:49,609 I believe in you, Mr. Fouler. 163 00:07:49,689 --> 00:07:50,857 My ball! 164 00:07:50,890 --> 00:07:52,697 My ball! 165 00:07:52,810 --> 00:07:54,569 It's okay, boy. The game's almost over. 166 00:07:54,650 --> 00:07:56,329 Come on! 167 00:07:56,409 --> 00:08:00,296 Ah, finally. What?! $25 for a soda?! 168 00:08:00,330 --> 00:08:02,776 Then you can drink the soda and fill it with free ketchup, 169 00:08:02,858 --> 00:08:05,289 - then drink the ketchup. - Floyd. 170 00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:07,528 Well, it's, uh, nice to see you outside the office. 171 00:08:07,610 --> 00:08:09,257 - Boss is here, too. - Huh? 172 00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:10,810 Goodman, you're on the kiss cam, okay? 173 00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:12,857 - Kiss cam! - Oh, come on! 174 00:08:12,937 --> 00:08:14,857 Kiss me, Mr. Goodman. 175 00:08:14,890 --> 00:08:16,249 Oh, no! 176 00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,409 - Uh, pardon me. Excuse me. - Over here, dad! 177 00:08:18,489 --> 00:08:19,906 - What took you so long?! - Gimme that! 178 00:08:19,930 --> 00:08:21,577 What? I was just... 179 00:08:21,658 --> 00:08:25,385 Still tied at 0-0... also the number of times my wife has 180 00:08:25,450 --> 00:08:28,265 told me she loves me. And that's strike two! 181 00:08:28,330 --> 00:08:31,609 Stay grounded, grandpa. 182 00:08:31,690 --> 00:08:33,577 You're just hallucinating from the steam. 183 00:08:33,641 --> 00:08:38,969 It's not real. Oh-ho! It's not real! 184 00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:41,576 It's not real! Aah! 185 00:08:41,610 --> 00:08:43,897 I-it is real! Agh! 186 00:08:43,978 --> 00:08:46,888 And Fouler back at the plate. 187 00:08:46,937 --> 00:08:50,168 - This one's going foul, boys. - Looks like he's predicting 188 00:08:50,250 --> 00:08:52,537 he'll hit this foul, which doesn't make sense. 189 00:08:52,618 --> 00:08:55,209 - Yay! - But neither does BMI. 190 00:08:55,290 --> 00:08:59,368 Please deal with reality. And here's the pitch! 191 00:08:59,450 --> 00:09:02,088 That ball doesn't look like it's going foul. 192 00:09:02,218 --> 00:09:04,489 Huh?! That ball is... a home run! 193 00:09:04,569 --> 00:09:05,956 - Agghh! - Oh, no! 194 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:09,497 - Hey! She's drowning! - Kiss cam! 195 00:09:09,577 --> 00:09:11,336 Huh?! No, no, no, no! 196 00:09:11,402 --> 00:09:13,689 And Jim "Fouler" Johnson winning the ballgame! 197 00:09:13,769 --> 00:09:16,457 Sadly, he'll go down in history as a murderer. 198 00:09:16,538 --> 00:09:20,133 - And we have a streaker, folks! - Is trying to cut my head off! 199 00:09:20,157 --> 00:09:21,288 You're under arrest! 200 00:09:21,370 --> 00:09:23,368 That is one crazy, old naked man! 201 00:09:23,417 --> 00:09:27,350 That grandpa sure is crazy. But sheriff actually got some good moves. 202 00:09:27,374 --> 00:09:28,857 Zippity-zoooooo! 203 00:09:28,969 --> 00:09:31,657 And that's the ballgame, folks! 204 00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:34,936 - Well, thanks for everything. - Baseball! 205 00:09:35,018 --> 00:09:36,808 You're disgusting. Let's go, baby. 206 00:09:36,857 --> 00:09:38,297 - Okay. Bye. - Beverly? 207 00:09:38,410 --> 00:09:39,688 You smell like medicine. 208 00:09:39,785 --> 00:09:41,656 But at least I didn't dent the truck. 209 00:09:41,738 --> 00:09:43,337 Gimme a kiss! Gimme a kiss! 210 00:09:43,369 --> 00:09:44,936 Kiss?! No! 211 00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:47,449 - Mom, are you okay? - Come on, Tommy. 212 00:09:47,530 --> 00:09:49,210 Let's get her to the shop... I mean, home. 213 00:09:49,258 --> 00:09:51,781 - Where's Mr. Pickles? - He'll find his way home. 214 00:09:51,805 --> 00:09:53,609 He always does. 215 00:09:53,690 --> 00:09:57,970 - Mm. Nice costume. - Stupid white people and their games. 216 00:09:57,994 --> 00:10:00,701 Hey-a, what's this over here? 217 00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:04,329 Breaking news! Native Americans buy the 218 00:10:04,378 --> 00:10:06,697 old town featherheads. Rename the team "old town 219 00:10:06,730 --> 00:10:09,977 stupid white people"! Ay, what up, dog?! 220 00:10:10,057 --> 00:10:12,297 Hot dogs! Get your hot dogs, here! 221 00:10:12,329 --> 00:10:15,129 Wow! Peanuts, too? 222 00:10:15,209 --> 00:10:17,642 Hey! It's Jim "Fouler" Johnson's foul ball! 223 00:10:17,666 --> 00:10:19,689 - Baseball! - Yes, just be quiet, please. 224 00:10:19,818 --> 00:10:22,297 Good boy, Mr. Pickles.